Thursday, November 20, 2008

the soul of our heart

Today I am sad. My sadness knows no bounds for the fact that my favorite Grandma left for heaven’s abode. I know she looks over us, and even now I am haunted by the knowingness I shall hold her hand no more.

The last time I held her hand, I whispered into her ears that I shall not allow her to go so easily. She’d smiled even then. She’d smiled to let us know. She’s smiled to give us warmth.

My mind wandered. Here and there. I left practice and then discovered – I was lost in thoughts. I’d lost my helmet. Who would now ask me to check if her clock was still working? I’d lost time’s count and I am still sad.

She’d asked for me, a moment and more. But I am sad I wasn’t there. Could there be more love than what she’s given? I am still sad. I wasn’t there.

And then when I wished to see her, I cried. And for one last time I saw her fragile face. And smile at me she did so too. I am sad but I am there.

Chandra, my favorite grandma, forever you shall remain…


Jane Borges said...

very beautifully written..reflects your love for your grand ma...AM sure she knows how much you love and care for her....

Her blessings will always be upon you...

faji said...

she will always be around watching over u dear..loved ones never leave u jus like tht.. they linger...n d moment we need em they r at ur side..
i knw.. mine has never left me..though the wrld thnks she has...
plz accept my heartfelt condolences..

Jean_Atkin_Mark_Hoot said...

From a writer's perspective: great piece. The short sentences, the aphorisms, the heartbreak.

/Not/ from a writer's perspective: I am sorry for your loss. I have not known her, but from what you told us about her, I would have liked to. God Bless her soul.

ReTRoSpEcTs said...

im happy i got to share her wid an awesome friend like u!! all her blessings will be wid u for now and forever. once again...

thank you nishath for a wonderfully written piece and for being part of our family through thick and thin!
lots of love

nishath said...

thank u everyone for ur kind words and support...

she'd love to see so much love!!!

love ya all!!!

Meera Vijayann said...

I know how it must feel..felt absolutely miserable when my grandmom passed years ago.. but then, memories don't die do they, they just live on:)

Hermes said...

You said when you'd die that you'd walk
with me everyday
And I'd start to cry and say please don't talk that way
With the blink of an eye the lord came
and asked you to leave
You went to a better place but He stole you
away from me

And now she lives in heaven
But i know they let her out
To take care of me

There's a strange kind of light
Caressing me tonight
Pray silence my fears she is near
Bringing heaven down here

I miss your love i miss your touch
But I'm feeling you everyday
And i can almost hear you say
"You've come along way baby"

And now you live in heaven
But i know they let you out
To take care of me

There's a strange kind of light
In my bedroom tonight
Prayer silence my fears she is near
Bringing heaven down here

You taught me kings and queens
While stroking my hair
In my darkest hour I know you are there
Kneeling down beside me
Whispering my prayer

Yes there's a strange kind of light
Caressing me tonight
Pray silence my fear
She is near
Bringing heaven down here

The next time that we meet
I will bow at her feet
And say wasn't life sweet
Then we'll prepare
To take heaven down there

-Nan's Song, R.W.

nishath said...

that was just way too awesome... loved the song... thnx a lot hermes...